WARNING!!! Some quotes may prove to be obscene by some...
"The Truth is a precious thing and must be protected by a bodyguard of lies" -- Sir Winston Churchill
"It is better to keep silent and be thought a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt" - Abraham Lincoln
"Life is like a box of chocolates, You never know which one has the Razorblade." -- Brian Brechlin
The very act of seeking sets something in motion to meet us; something in the universe, or in the unconcious responds as if to an invitation. - Jean Shinoda Bolen
"Don't be so humble - you are not that great." - Golda Meir to a visiting diplomat
Assassins!" - Arturo Toscanini to his orchestra
"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it." - Oscar Wilde
"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me." - Alice Roosevelt Longworth
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas
"From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it." - Groucho Marx
"The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people." - Lucille S. Harper
"The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows." - Aristotle Onassis
"I would have made a good Pope." - Richard M. Nixon
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein
"Love is an irresistable desire to be irresistably desired. " Robert Frost
"Sometimes we are inclined to class those who are once-and-a-half witted with the half-witted, because we appreciate only a third part of their wit." - Henry David Thoreau
La vide, la canobbe e restò senza e voce e moto. Ahi vista! ahi conoscenza! -- John Heywood. 1 Circa 1565.
In hope her to attain by hook or crook. -- Sir Philip Sidney
My dear, my better half. -- George Chapman
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house. -- Zsa Zsa Gabor
It's time to stop denying the 'inner bitch' in ourselves. Stop apologizing for her. Set her free. -- Elizabeth Hilts
If women can sleep their way to the top, how come they aren't there?... There must be an epidemic of insomnia out there. -- Ellen Goodman
I became a feminist as an alternative to becoming a masochist. -- Sally Kempton
The vote means nothing to women. We should be armed. -- Edna O'Brien
Quotes about Beer by Famous People
If brevity is the soul of wit, your penis must be a riot. -- Donna Gephart
"The greatest happiness is to scatter your enemy and drive him before you. To see his cities reduced to ashes. To see those who love him shrouded in tears. And to gather to your bosom his wives and daughters." --Genghis Khan
When in doubt, blow something up. -- JMS, creator of B5
"The door to your cage is open. All you have to do is walk out... if you dare." - George Lucas
I think; therefore, I'm single. -- Lizz Winstead
(To the crowd) How many women here like to have sex in the morning? Now how many like to be awake when it happens? -- Marsha Warfield
I date this girl for two years - and then the nagging starts: "I wanna know your name." -- Mike Binder
Relationships don't last any more. When I meet a guy, the first question I ask is, "Is this the guy I want my children spending their weekends with?" -- Rita Rudner
I went out to dinner with a Marine last weekend. He looked across the table and he goes, "I could kill you in seven seconds." I go, "I'll just have toast then." -- Margaret Smith
"If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base." ---Dave Barry
"While there is a lower class, I am in it, while there is a criminal element, I am of it, while there is a soul in prison, I am not free." --Eugene V. Debs
"We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender." --Sir Winston Churchill
Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy and the lash. -- Sir Winston Churchill
Just because someone can buy a computer and plug it into the wall doesn't mean that they themselves are wired up right. -- JMS, creator of B5
Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, DC
She's thinking, "My son is a stud!" -- Scott Hamilton
Who knew it was that hard to get a virgin off your face? -- Whoopi Goldburg
It's the last Academy Awards show before the millenium, and I get to host it. That makes me the last Twenty Century Fox. -- Whoopi Goldburg
"Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at that moment."-- Robert Benchley
"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."-- Lily Tomlin
"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve immortality through not dying."-- Woody Allen
"Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward."--- unknown
"I have studied it often, but I never could discover the plot." -- Mark Twain (about the dictionary)
Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats. -- H.L. Mencken