Don't play with your food, especially after you've already eaten it.

Kinky sex is for those who can't handle normal sex.

Hugs don't feel as good on the computer.

Speak softly, but carry an M16.

Change a life; make someone feel important.

Don't let schooling get in the way of your education.

It's all a pigment of your hallucination.

Your type doesn't stay around long enough to stay your type.

Yea, though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest sonofabitch in the valley.

Consider yourself hugged.

Just take a cold shower and sleep it off.

In theory, everything works.

Life is recursive.

The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of the oncoming train.

Plagiarism is copying from one source; research is copying from two or more.

Repetition is always better the second time.

Clever is getting out alive.

Around here, to be nuts is normal, to be sane is stupid.

Just plead the Fifth -- or drink it -- either way.

Death is the consequence of being alive.

Life's a beach, and then you drown.

Don't worry about life; you're not going to survive it, anyway.

Never open a book before 4 p.m. Sunday. (Rule of Weekend Studying)

Believe in Darwin; cancer cures smoking.

Time flies when you don't know what you're doing.

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